still away

Forgive me if I smile, it's just to hide my fears. Forgive me if I laugh, it's just to hide the tears.

to my prince 

I love it when you kiss me, and touch my hair, when you pull me close and silently promise that you'll always stay.When you hugged me, everything felt perfect ♥  . after we patch up,
no texts, no calls, nothing. But I'm still here thinking about you like crazy.
Everyone tells me, "you deserve better", but then no one is willing to give it to me.Sometimes i have to stand alone to prove that what i said but i'm the only person know the filling.

Looking back on the first time we met, I can't escape and I can't forget. You're the one, you still turn me on, you can make me happy again. and yet, they only my dreams.
Sometimes i just need to distance myself from you. If you care, you'll notice. If you don't, then i know where i stand.maybe i gotta accept the fact that certain things will NEVER go back to how they use to be.

Admit it. i care too much about the person who would never care about me.
I said I'd never let you go when I never did. I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it.I just wish I can rewind time and replay everything.I wish I could go back and say everything I kept inside.
I always play out impossible scenarios in my head.I still remember all the sweet things you said, they keep me up at night.I allow myself to get too attached too quickly to fall in love with you..and only u can put the smile every time on my face.

Sometimes I wonder if I mean as much to you as i do to you.I wanted to tell you all my secrets, but you became one of them instead.I must admit, you were not a part of my book. But if you open it up and take a look, you’re the beginning and end of every chapter.I hate that you seem perfectly fine without me.You can ignore me for as long as you want , but you can never change the memories I brought to your life.

I miss you, all day, every day. And you can't even imagine how pathetic it makes me feel, because I don't even know if you miss me back. I keep telling myself that I don't miss you and I don't love you. Hoping one day I'll believe it.i wish I had saved up all the tears I cried over you so I could drown you in them and then u will know how much i hurt without you.